Dennis Hollingsworth

Mark Twain!

?We wish to learn all the curious, outlandish ways of all the different countries, so that we can ?show off? and astonish people when we get home. We wish to excite the envy of our own untraveled friends with our strange foreign fashions which we can?t shake off...The gentle reader will never, never know what a consummate ass he can become, until he goes abroad. I speak now, of course, in the supposition that the gentle reader has not been abroad, and therefore is not already a consummate ass.?
?Mark Twain, The Innocents Abroad, 1869